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Foods to eat, drinking game for Super Bowl parties

Viewpoints Editor

Published: Monday, January 27, 2014

Updated: Monday, January 27, 2014 22:01

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Super Sunday is less than a week away, and that means it’s about time to start planning for a super party. Thankfully this is the one party event of the year when the entertainment is already scheduled, so instead of wasting time worrying about crafting playlists and scouring the Internet for games, you can focus more on food and logistics.

When it comes to food, the amount of effort and creativity you put forth should be inversely proportional to the amount of alcohol you plan on drinking. In other words, nobody cares about your baked Brie and cranberry chutney if they’re slurring obscenities about Roger Goodell and how the Steelers should be playing today.

That being said, if you’re of a more responsible persuasion and don’t anticipate surrounding yourself with feckless, wasted degenerates, this is your day to shine. One route to take is adopting the local cuisine for the two represented cities in the big game: Seattle and Denver.

The Pacific Northwest is known for its seafood, particularly Dungeness crab. Unless you like picking crab shells out of your furniture and carpet until April, I wouldn’t waste the money considering how little edible yield a boiled crab returns. Smoked salmon is probably a better route to bring the taste of Seattle to your home. It’s readily available and easy to prepare with crackers and cream cheese. If you’re feeling particularly ambitious, cucumber slices add a refreshing textural change to the salmon and cheese.

Now as far as Denver food goes, there are Rocky Mountain oysters, which happen to be bull testicles and not actual oysters, so moving on… Colorado is also known for its unique variation on chili, made with pork and Anaheim chilies, which give it a distinct greenish hue. Recipes abound online, but my personal favorite (because it appears to require less prep than others) is the Colorado Green Chili from allrecipes.com. As with any chili, you’ll want to give yourself a two to five hour head start in order to have it ready to serve by kickoff.

I’m getting hungry writing this, so how about some tips for the less culinary among us? First, you can never overstock on beer or snacks. Leftover brew or chips is never a bad thing, and based on my own experience, the beer sections of grocery and convenience stores devolve into a hellish Mad Max-style anarchy at halftime. If you want to avoid getting stabbed for snagging the last bottle of Boone’s Farm, stock up ahead of time, ideally a day or two in advance.

Drinking games? Piece of cake. When Denver has the ball, take a drink each time Peyton Manning barks out “Omaha!” at the line of scrimmage. When Seattle has the ball, take a drink for each Marshawn Lynch stiff-arm and every time the camera pans to Pete Carroll looking smug and farty on the sidelines. Finally if Troy Aikman and Joe Buck stop actually calling the game to debate whether or not Russell Wilson is an “elite” quarterback, chug until they get back to discussing the action on the field. You’ll be hammered by halftime.

No matter how you celebrate America’s great secular holiday, just remember to enjoy yourself. We only get one Super Bowl per year, so make it one to remember, no matter how the game develops.

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